We focus on supporting the connection between infants and their parents/carers, encouraging the development of a strong, loving relationship.
We understand that such things as difficulties in pregnancy, a traumatic birth, past parenting experiences, loss or bereavement, low mood or anxiety can all affect your relationship with your child.
We offer support to understand and strengthen this relationship. At times we do this by working with colleagues in our wider NHS specialist services. Here are a couple of videos from a simarlar service in Blackpool that describes the work of teams like ours:
Videos
Here are some of the interventions the NHS Lothian PAIRS team offer:
Reflective Parenting
PAIRS clinicians are trained in Reflective Parenting, an approach to parenting that aims to reduce conflict and strengthen parent-infant relationships. Parents are supported to develop a better understanding of their infant’s emotions and behaviours, helping the child feel validated and understood. Reflective Parenting has a theoretical basis in Mentalization – the ability of a parent to understand the thoughts, feelings and intention behind their child’s, and their own, behaviours. Research shows that this can lead to better emotion regulation in children, as well as improved relationships and enhanced understanding of self and others.
Child Parent Psychotherapy
Child Parent Psychotherapy (CPP) is a trauma informed therapeutic approach for children ages 0-5 and their caregivers. It works by strengthening relationships between parent / carers and infants, and helping families heal and grow after stressful and traumatic events. When difficult life events happen, families sometimes need support to make sense of these experiences, know what they can expect in the future, and manage difficult emotions for both parent/carer and child. CPP is a lengthy intervention that works with both caregiver and child.
Video Interactive Guidance
Video Interactive Guidance, or VIG, uses video clips of interactions between a parent and infant to strengthen their relationship. The practitioner takes a short video of a parent and infant and finds moments of positive connection and enjoyment with each other. These moments are shared with the parent, boosting their confidence in recognising and responding to their infant’s needs.
Usually a course of 3 -4 video based sessions are offered and can be undertaken at home or in a clinic.
Video interactive guidance website
What parents who have VIG from our service have said about it:
I honestly wasn’t sure what to expect from VIG, I was worried I would feel uncomfortable being filmed having interactions with my son and they wouldn’t feel authentic. It was a strange concept to get my head around in the beginning but you soon forget you are being filmed
I found my experience of doing VIG very eye opening, my perception of how I was with my son was completely different to what was being shown to me when we watched back and spoke it through. I truthfully didn’t think VIG would help my relationship with him and was sceptical but once we had completed it, I realised it had changed so much.
I take time to enjoy the smaller moments now. Little things before such as playing together on the floor with sensory toys, I felt it wasn’t enough and I constantly had to do more. Realising that was enough for him and my time, interaction and love was all he needed has given me a new outlook on our relationship. Slowing down to enjoy things more has made me more comfortable being Mum.
Yes, I would. It may seem daunting or sound a bit unusual to begin with, but it really changed everything for me. The team are a fantastic support and will guide you through answering all your questions.
Following the birth of my first child I developed PND and PNA, but suffered in silence for months, which only served to make things worse. So, when I became pregnant with my daughter four years later, I knew the signs to look for and sought support quickly. I spoke to my Health Visitor who immediately referred me to the PAIRS service.
I met with one of the Clinical Psychologists from PAIRS who outlined what the service provided in terms of support and it was at this point I was introduced to the idea of VIG. Initially, I was very sceptical for a number of reasons. Parenting was the one area I felt that I was failing, so I wasn’t particularly thrilled about having it captured on film. I didn’t quite see how this approach would help me overcome my feelings of low mood and poor self-belief and I genuinely thought it would only serve to compound these feelings further.
I was provided with some literature to mull over, which highlighted the positive impact that VIG can have and I agreed to give it a try regardless of my reservations.
I don’t enjoy being in front of the camera and I especially don’t like being filmed. So, at first, I was a bit awkward and it took me a little while to relax into it. Eventually though, I soon forgot the camera was even there and before long I was interacting naturally with my children.
I was extremely anxious to watch the footage back, as I didn’t feel as though the session had gone very well. I was convinced that there wouldn’t be anything positive to take from the recording at all.
Of course, there was the initial awkwardness around watching myself on camera, but once I got over that embarrassment, I was finally able to see its true value.
The video footage provided real life evidence of me interacting with my children in a positive and loving way. I realised pretty quickly, that the narrative I had been telling myself, didn’t match up with the reality. I had convinced myself that I didn’t offer anything of value to my children, that I wasn’t a very attentive parent and that I wasn’t particularly in tune with my children’s needs. Yet here I was watching myself in real time, do just all of that. With my psychologist’s help, I could see the subtleties in my parenting that I wasn’t even aware of. There was so much about me as a mum, that I just couldn’t see from inside my own head.
The biggest lesson I took from the experience was that the reality often isn’t as awful as I’m telling myself it is and that even when I think I’m failing as a mum, I’m more than likely not. As a result, I’ve cut myself some slack and stopped holding myself to impossibly high standards which has meant my children get a more authentic version of me.
My mental health struggles have always been about my relationship to myself as a mother and the impact that my own childhood experiences have had on my self-worth. Since having my first child, I have experienced many different approaches to dealing with my mental health. But none of them have offered the level of insight that VIG has.
Newborn Behavioural Observation
The Newborn Behavioural Observation or NBO is designed to strengthen the relationship between infants and parents, by supporting parents to read their baby’s cues. It is used with infants from birth to 3 months of age.
The observations are done with the parent/carer, to support them to understand their infant’s unique strengths and areas they need support. This in turn increases parents’ skills and confidence in getting to know and care for their infant and feel closer to them.
Groups
Circle of Security Parenting
The Circle of Security Parenting program is a non-judgmental space for parents to reflect on their own attachment experiences and then think differently around their child’s behaviour. Parents are then better able to provide a “secure base” for their child and improve their child’s attachment.
The program runs weekly over 8 sessions of approximately 60 to 90 minutes each. Each session involves video footage, handouts, practical tasks, and discussion.
Week 1: The concept of the Circle
Week 2: Exploring our children’s needs all the way around the Circle
Week 3: “Being with” – helping our children manage their emotions
Week 4: “Being with” infants on the Circle
Week 5: The path to security
Week 6: Exploring our own struggles
Week 7: Rupture and repair
Week 8: Summary and our own celebration
Resources for Parents – Circle of Security International
Baby Bonding
Baby Bonding sessions creates a space that is welcoming, relaxed, and accepting of how you and baby are feeling on that particular day!
The sessions consist of; a hello song, some lovely activities for you and your bump or baby such as massage, baby watching, mindfulness, information on babies’ communication and brain development.
Each week finishes with a small “gift” for parents and carers which might be things like massage oil for baby strokes, information about your baby’s development, a self-made toy for you and your little one to enjoy together and a short relaxation exercise to help create a moment of stillness and calm in all the chaos parenthood can bring!
Supporting and Training Professionals
We also offer support and training for professionals working with infants and their families.
